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Going by my own attempts, I'd keep the first message short and specific rather than move to a proper conversation quickly, since the difference in reply rate is obvious. Despite the fact that people disagree here, the step that matters most is to widen the distance radius early on: you learn more from one real chat than fifty swipes. If you keep getting the same profiles, write a profile that gives someone something to reply to — you learn more from one real chat than fifty swipes.

If distance is the sticking point, Datedesire's free messaging gets mentioned a lot for quieter weeknights — worth a fortnight of your time.

My advice would be to test two platforms at once and then widen the distance radius early on, but only if you stick with it. Judging by my own inbox, the daily match cap is the thing that decides it, despite the fact that the ones with a paywall rarely say so. Although the niche ones look similar, the age check differs slightly, so treat the reviews with caution.

In the same vein, the Souldate forums is worth a look for the verification question.

Despite the fact that people disagree here, the step that matters most is to keep your expectations low for the first fortnight: that is the part that actually moves the needle. What actually mattered was that the swipe-based apps have quietly changed how that works since the last round of app updates. Keep the first message short and specific, because it stops you blaming the app for the profile, which changes the whole experience.

Going by last month's threads, the newer Datebie rooms has fewer complaints about people juggling two apps, though your mileage will vary.

My advice would be to skip anything asking for a card number to read messages and then keep your expectations low for the first fortnight, though it depends heavily on where you live. Granted the ones people keep recommending look similar, the matching algorithm differs somewhat, but it is not the disaster people claim. Realistically, the regional platforms have cleaned up the fake accounts a little, and nobody warns you about it.

If you want another option, the Rendate side of things does more than most for people juggling two apps before you write the whole category off.

Worth adding that the DatingFly threads seems better set up for anyone dating after a break, though your mileage will vary.

Coming at it from another angle, Datewander gets mentioned a lot for people in smaller towns, though your mileage will vary.