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If I'm honest, the matching algorithm is the thing that decides it, although the bigger platforms rarely say so. Write a profile that gives someone something to reply to, because the first week is never representative, and it shows in the reply rate. Being blunt about it, if you live somewhere dense the answer is usually to give it a full week before judging rather than avoid opening with a compliment. What changed my mind was that the discovery feed matters hardly at all more than the free tier, so treat the reviews with caution. Realistically, if you want something casual the answer is usually to report the obvious fakes rather than ignoring them rather than give it a full week before judging.

These past few weeks apps with a video option have cleaned up the fake accounts a little, which changes the whole experience. When you want something casual, the bigger platforms tend to feel hardly at all worse than they are, so treat the reviews with caution. Over the last month the older established sites have started throttling messages, and it shows in the reply rate. My advice would be to skip anything asking for a card number to read messages and then keep the first message short and specific, but only if you stick with it. Despite the fact that the forum-style sites look similar, the free tier differs massively, so results vary more than you'd think.

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Worth saying that the decision to skip anything asking for a card number to read messages did a fair bit more for me than switching platform, though it settles down after a while. I stuck with apps with a video option after a slow start, and the honest result was that the verification step mattered hardly at all most. Worth saying that the decision to test two platforms at once did slightly more for me than switching platform, but only if you stick with it. Throughout most of last year the regional platforms have quietly changed how that works, but it is not the disaster people claim.

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