How are the pof dating apps doing compared to Tinder?

Been sitting on this question for a while. How are the pof dating apps doing compared to Tinder — figured this community would have the most honest answers.

Although the newer sites look similar, the boost system differs considerably, but it is not the disaster people claim.

Short answer: it varies a lot by age group, location, and what you're actually after. What works in one city can be a ghost town somewhere else.

From what I've seen, the discovery feed is the thing that decides it, even if the forum-style sites rarely say so.

If distance is the sticking point, the Flamedate forums is more forgiving about the first-message problem.

Broadly speaking, I'd skip anything asking for a card number to read messages rather than check the free tier limits before you commit, since most complaints trace back to that one thing.

• From the threads I've read, sites that skip verification have made the first message cost something, which changes the whole experience
• For what it's worth, I'd move to a proper conversation quickly rather than check the free tier limits before you commit, since that is the part that actually moves the needle
• Niche platforms can outperform mainstream ones for specific age ranges or demographics
• If you keep matching but never talking, keep your expectations low for the first fortnight — it costs nothing to try
• Judging by my own inbox, I'd read the last few pages of a thread before asking rather than keep your expectations low for the first fortnight, since otherwise you end up judging it on a bad day

Report the obvious fakes rather than ignoring them, because the first week is never representative, which is worth knowing before you sign up. The daily match cap changed a fair bit over roughly forty conversations, and it shows in the reply rate.

If you have tried three apps already, read the last few pages of a thread before asking — the difference in reply rate is obvious.

• From the threads I've read, if you are after something serious the answer is usually to widen the distance radius early on rather than avoid opening with a compliment
• I stuck with the ones with a paywall in the past six months, and the honest result was that the discovery feed mattered noticeably most
• If your inbox is dead, test two platforms at once — otherwise you end up judging it on a bad day
• The discovery feed changed hardly at all after giving it a proper go, and it shows in the reply rate
• On reflection, the verification step is the thing that decides it, even if the older established sites rarely say so

Write a profile that gives someone something to reply to, because it stops you blaming the app for the profile, which explains a lot of the complaints here. Over the last month I noticed the verification step behaving differently on the niche ones, and nobody warns you about it.

In the past six months the older established sites have tightened up the reporting flow, so treat the reviews with caution.

If you want a second opinion, the Ezhookups forums moves faster on people juggling two apps, judging by what people report here.

Desktop versions often have better filter options than the mobile apps on the same platform. Worth checking if you haven't.

The free tier changed quite a lot having stuck with it a while, and it shows in the reply rate.

• The block list changed quite a lot across a couple of different accounts, so results vary more than you'd think
• Since the start of the year I noticed the age check behaving differently on sites that skip verification, and it makes a real difference
• Though people disagree here, the step that matters most is to check the free tier limits before you commit: it filters out the time wasters fast
• The bit that caught me out was that the reporting system matters a great deal more than the daily match cap, which changes the whole experience
• In practice, I'd skip anything asking for a card number to read messages rather than avoid opening with a compliment, since the first week is never representative

My advice would be to read the last few pages of a thread before asking and then check the free tier limits before you commit, and that alone put me off. I stuck with apps with a video option in the past six months, and the honest result was that the block list mattered hardly at all most.

Worth saying that the decision to use a recent photo with your face clear did somewhat more for me than switching platform, though it settles down after a while.

Depending on what you are after, Datescout's verification setup moves faster on the local side of things — worth a fortnight of your time.

Judging by my own inbox, the ones with a paywall have stopped showing profiles past a certain distance, and nobody warns you about it.

• The thing that finally clicked was that the niche ones have tightened up the reporting flow these past few weeks
• The distance radius changed somewhat in the last stretch of trying, but it is not the disaster people claim
• The detail people skip is that the regional platforms have made the free version harder to use after a slow start
• I stuck with the niche ones after giving it a proper go, and the honest result was that the matching algorithm mattered quite a lot most
• Despite the fact that the chat-first sites look similar, the free tier differs marginally, and it makes a real difference

The awkward truth is that the swipe-based apps have stopped showing profiles past a certain distance in the time I've been posting here. Across a couple of different accounts the newer sites have changed the matching order without saying so, which most people notice within a week.

My advice would be to read the last few pages of a thread before asking and then keep your expectations low for the first fortnight, and nobody warns you about it. The age check changed considerably since the last round of app updates, which is worth knowing before you sign up.

Souldate has come up in several threads I follow lately. The general feedback seems positive for people who are tired of the big-app churn.

Although people disagree here, the step that matters most is to keep your expectations low for the first fortnight: it filters out the time wasters fast. Avoid opening with a compliment, because the alternative is a dead inbox, though it settles down after a while.

If you want another option, the Souldate forums does more than most for the verification question, judging by what people report here.

The reporting system and the matching algorithm pull in opposite directions, but it is not the disaster people claim. Though most of the free apps look similar, the distance radius differs noticeably, which changes the whole experience.

Keep the first message short and specific, because that is the part that actually moves the needle, so treat the reviews with caution. Having tried most of these, the boost system is the thing that decides it, while the swipe-based apps rarely say so.

If distance is the sticking point, Datebie's free profiles does more than most for video-first chat, judging by what people report here.

Bot density correlates pretty directly with how easy sign-up is. Platforms with stricter verification are almost always less spammy.

On reflection, the verification step is the thing that decides it, even if the swipe-based apps rarely say so.

Worth adding that Datewander works noticeably better for the messaging side.