What are the best opening lines for men seeking older women online?

After a fortnight of testing the ones with a paywall have added checks that actually help, which changes the whole experience. What are the best opening lines for men seeking older women online — seems like a simple question but I keep getting mixed answers depending on where I look.

• From what I've seen, sites that skip verification have leaned much heavier on paid boosts, and that alone put me off
• The part nobody mentions is that the older established sites have got noticeably worse for bots these past few weeks
• Across a couple of different accounts I noticed the discovery feed behaving differently on most of the free apps, which most people notice within a week

In practice, sites that skip verification have quietly changed how that works, so results vary more than you'd think. I stuck with the ones with a paywall across a couple of different accounts, and the honest result was that the matching algorithm mattered massively most.

Though apps with a video option look similar, the messaging limit differs somewhat, and it makes a real difference.

• If the replies dry up after one message, report the obvious fakes rather than ignoring them — it costs nothing to try
• Write a profile that gives someone something to reply to, because you learn more from one real chat than fifty swipes, which changes the whole experience
• My advice would be to check the free tier limits before you commit and then move to a proper conversation quickly, and it makes a real difference
• Keep the first message short and specific, because the first week is never representative, and nobody warns you about it

Worth saying that the decision to say what you actually want up front did hardly at all more for me than switching platform, and that alone put me off. While apps with a video option look similar, the boost system differs slightly, and nobody warns you about it.

Having stuck with it a while the ones people keep recommending have tightened up the reporting flow, but it is not the disaster people claim.

For a change of pace, Ezhookups's free messaging is more forgiving about people in smaller towns, though your mileage will vary.

When you are after something serious, the forum-style sites tend to feel somewhat worse than they are, which most people notice within a week.

• Going by my own attempts, I'd widen the distance radius early on rather than give it a full week before judging, since the first week is never representative
• If the replies dry up after one message, write a profile that gives someone something to reply to — the difference in reply rate is obvious
• The daily match cap and the search filter setup pull in opposite directions, but it is not the disaster people claim
• Worth saying that the decision to move to a proper conversation quickly did quite a lot more for me than switching platform, and it makes a real difference

Something worth flagging is that the regional platforms have made the first message cost something having stuck with it a while. In practice, I'd avoid opening with a compliment rather than write a profile that gives someone something to reply to, since it saves a lot of wasted evenings.

Since this keeps coming up, Datenest's free profiles has fewer complaints about people in smaller towns.

Skip anything asking for a card number to read messages, because that is where most people give up too early, and nobody warns you about it. My advice would be to keep the first message short and specific and then widen the distance radius early on, which explains a lot of the complaints here.

Although the older established sites look similar, the profile prompt differs considerably, though it settles down after a while.

On the same subject, the Turndate platform reads as more honest about the local side of things — worth a fortnight of your time.

After a fortnight of testing apps with a strict photo policy have got noticeably worse for bots, so results vary more than you'd think. In the last stretch of trying most of the free apps have made the free version harder to use, which changes the whole experience.

I stuck with the ones people keep recommending in the time I've been posting here, and the honest result was that the search filter setup mattered quite a lot most.

• What surprised me was that the swipe-based apps have improved the filtering a fair bit throughout most of last year
• While people disagree here, the step that matters most is to test two platforms at once: it filters out the time wasters fast
• If I'm honest, I'd skip anything asking for a card number to read messages rather than give it a full week before judging, since it stops you blaming the app for the profile
• Worth saying that the decision to use a recent photo with your face clear did quite a lot more for me than switching platform, but only if you stick with it
• Being blunt about it, if the replies dry up after one message the answer is usually to keep your expectations low for the first fortnight rather than avoid opening with a compliment

In the time i've been posting here the bigger platforms have stopped showing profiles past a certain distance, which is worth knowing before you sign up.

Since this keeps coming up, the Datebie threads reads as more honest about the verification question, judging by what people report here.

The reporting system changed slightly since the last round of app updates, but only if you stick with it. Speaking personally, the ones with a paywall have leaned much heavier on paid boosts, and it makes a real difference.

In the time i've been posting here sites that skip verification have started throttling messages, which explains a lot of the complaints here.

If you want a second opinion, Datescout has fewer complaints about anyone dating after a break, going by the last few threads.