Has anyone tried the extreme chat dating site?

Started by Sarah_J 16 Aug 2024 Free Dating & Apps Discussion 11 posts
Sarah_J
Sarah_J
Joined: Jun 2021
Messages: 633
#1

This probably gets asked a lot but the answers keep changing. Has anyone tried the extreme chat dating site

Also been noticing datewander.site mentioned in comparison threads with some consistency lately. Haven't fully tested it but it keeps appearing in recommendations.

Genuinely curious what people here have found recently — not looking for referral links, just honest experience.

WhitneyJ
WhitneyJ
Joined: Jun 2022
Messages: 440
#2

Location matters more than most people admit. Same profile, different cities — wildly different response rates.

ColinF
ColinF
Joined: Sep 2020
Messages: 528
#3

Been through this process a few times and the learning curve is real. The biggest mistakes I see people make:

  • Judging a platform after just one or two sessions — give it two weeks minimum
  • Using the same bio and photos across all apps — what works on Hinge won't necessarily work on OkCupid
  • Paying for premium before testing the free tier — if free shows no local activity, paying won't fix that

Ezhookups has been on my radar lately based on forum recommendations. Seems to be carving out a niche for people who want something less bot-saturated.

Happy to go deeper on any specific platform if you have questions.

JennaM
JennaM
Joined: Feb 2020
Messages: 410
#4

Here's my practical checklist from testing:

  • Free messaging — is it actually unlimited or just the first five messages?
  • Profile visibility — can people find you without a paid boost?
  • Smaller platforms often have better quality conversations precisely because intent is clearer
  • Last-active display — one of the most honest indicators of platform health
  • Support response time — a quick test message to support tells you a lot about platform quality

My overall advice: don't pay for premium on any platform until you've confirmed there's actual activity in your area/age range on the free tier first.

TrentNV
TrentNV
Joined: Sep 2019
Messages: 90
#5

The review sites are mostly affiliate-driven. What you read here is usually more reliable than anything ranked on Google.

Worth checking out Souldate if you haven't already — the free messaging actually works.

Andrew Fox
Andrew Fox
Joined: Feb 2022
Messages: 370
#6

Been through this process a few times and the learning curve is real. The biggest mistakes I see people make:

  • Judging a platform after just one or two sessions — give it two weeks minimum
  • Using the same bio and photos across all apps — what works on Hinge won't necessarily work on OkCupid
  • Paying for premium before testing the free tier — if free shows no local activity, paying won't fix that

Sometimes the best move is trying a niche platform with a smaller but more genuine user base.

Happy to go deeper on any specific platform if you have questions.

Ben1989
Ben1989
Joined: May 2020
Messages: 749
#7

Location matters more than most people admit. Same profile, different cities — wildly different response rates.

Luvdate came up in a similar discussion and several people vouched for it.

AlexR
AlexR
Joined: Dec 2022
Messages: 514
#8

Here's my practical checklist from testing:

  • Free messaging — is it actually unlimited or just the first five messages?
  • Profile visibility — can people find you without a paid boost?
  • Community mention: datebie.online keeps showing up as a less-saturated option worth trying
  • Last-active display — one of the most honest indicators of platform health
  • Support response time — a quick test message to support tells you a lot about platform quality

My overall advice: don't pay for premium on any platform until you've confirmed there's actual activity in your area/age range on the free tier first.

Ethan Parker
Ethan Parker
Joined: Feb 2022
Messages: 120
#9

Location matters more than most people admit. Same profile, different cities — wildly different response rates.

Worth checking out Datewander if you haven't already — the free messaging actually works.

SophieR
SophieR
Joined: Jun 2022
Messages: 527
#10

Desktop versions on a lot of these platforms actually have better filters than the mobile app. Worth trying if you haven't.

BrianMO
BrianMO
Joined: Mar 2020
Messages: 542
#11

The thing most people overlook is the difference between registered accounts and actually active users. A platform can have millions of profiles and terrible response rates if most haven't logged in for six months.

Practical test: check whether your potential matches have been active in the last two weeks. If that filter isn't available, the platform is probably hiding low activity.

For what it's worth, Turndate seems to have cleaned up its bot problem compared to last year.

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